Because No One Demanded It!
by Kai Bahamut
Summary: Fights that Marvel would never do, all because you said you didn't want it!


Disclaimer: Iron man and Iron fist are property of Marvel. As are the other characters coming in later chapters. Now please don't sue.

Iron Fist left his apartment for a brisk jog; after all he had to keep in shape. He decided to go out in costume. After all something might happen to him and he would need to be prepared. There was no conflict on whether or not to dress up. Preparedness had been drilled into his head from all his years of martial arts training. He jogged for a couple of miles then he took a brief rest and realized he had screwed up. "Dang, I appear to have forgotten my water bottle." So much for that preparedness. He spotted a bar across the street. Though he usually avoided such establishments he was really thirsty and didn't have much of a choice.

Tony Stark was busy doing what he had done for a good part of his life, which was drinking it away. This time was different though, he had just gotten back from an extremely grisly battle. They had gone to help free some aliens from slavery. One of their foes energy cannons had burned away the left side of the Caps body. The aliens had advanced medical machines that saved his life and fully healed but it had shaken him to the core. The only way he knew to feel better was to hope that the stench of alcohol can replace the smell of burning flesh.

Iron fist made his way to the main bar and found himself a stool. The bartender saw him and came his way. W_ell, despite being a drinking establishment the bartender seems attentive. _"What'll be buddy?" The tender inquired of him. "Ill have a tall glass of water, thank you." The bartender grabbed a tall glass went over to a tap and filled it to the top. Iron fist remembered he probably would have asked for ice but he was fine as long as it was at least wet. The tender set it down and fist took a big gulp of hit. He was hit hard by it and nearly fell off his stool. "It aint a good idea to drink that much vodka in one gulp, bud." The tender chuckled. "But I asked for water." Asked Iron fist between his gags. "Don't tell me you actually came in for normal water. Sorry bud buthere that what we callvodka."He paused as took a good look at his customer. "You'se Iron fist, ain'tcha?" His throat and stomach burned but he told him yes. "Good cuz we might have problem hear soon. You see at the other end of the bar." Iron fist turned to look and saw Iron man chugging down a pitcher of beer and calling for another. "You remember that time he got drunk and got into a brawl? Heard the place was razed to the ground and I don't want that. If you stay here until he leaves I'll make it worth your while k?" Iron fist being a superhero, could only nod his head and hope.

"You're an ass!" "You're a moron!" Iron man and another patron of the bar had begun throwing insults at each other and things looked as if they might go critical. Iron Fist gathered his courage and went over to Tony. "Tony, its time to head home you've had too much to drink." Iron man turned and looked at fist. Not only did he not recognize him, he misidentified him. _"Wait a minute,yellow head, green body and yellow feet. It's the bastard he got Cap!" _Iron man quickly back handed fist and sent him flying into a table near the door. As quickly as a shit faced drunk man could, he made his way to the fallen martial artist. Fist groaned as he tried to get up. Seeing that iron man was heading his way he got up and went out on the street. Iron man soon came lumbering out of the bar and stumbled his way toward fist. _"There's no way out now, im just gonna have to try and disable him." _He ran forward, jumped, and twisted his body into a kick. Though he knew that his kick would have taken a normal mans head off he was barely moved. "Yer gonna pay for what happened to the Cap." He proclaimed in a drunken manner as he took a swing at Iron fist. He danced out of the way, of that blow and the ones that followed. Being drunk had made him slower but he was still just as strong. He got lucky and again backhanded Iron fist who landed farther down the street. His head was pounding and he could hardly think. Iron man activated all his weapons system and charged up his repulseor rays and prepared to fire. "This ones for you, Cap." He said with a tiny, tiny, tiny tear. Then he unleashed a massive amount of fire power at the third-stringer hero. All fist could do is crouch down, cross his arms is front of him, and make his peace with life.

Hell erupted all around him, explosions from missiles, pavement being blasted away by repulseor rays and lot of destruction in general. But suddenly it all stopped. Both men of iron were shocked. Iron fist couldn't believer he was alive, albeit cut up by flying asphalt. "Well, looks like if you want something done, you do it yourself!" He yelled as he was propelled by his jets. (Note: he's in a semi upright position for this k?) Iron fist crouched down and began to focus his chi. His namesake technique was his only hope now. He put every ounce on energy into his fist and hoped it would be enough to stop the invincible Iron Man. Iron man revved up the jets as high as they would go and reared back his fist. When he was within arms reach Fist stuck. Iron man stopped instantly and collapsed to the ground. However surprising that was what happened next shocked fist more than an electric eel. He felt pain, which wasn't supposed to happen. He felt pain shooting up through his arm so intense it shouldn't be real. He blacked out almost instantly.

When he next came to he found himself somewhere he hadn't seen much of and didn't expect to see much more of. But there he was in the avengers' med bay with Captain America, Scarlet Witch, and Thor at his bedside. His gaze drifted to his arm and saw that it was in an odd looking cast. The Cap cleared his throat and began to speak. "On behalf of the avengers and the nation, we thank you deeply." Fist was still trying to think of what happened after he punched Iron Man. "Yeah, thanks but what happened to my arm?" Thor gave him his answer and he didn't like it a bit. "Verily, brave on. When thou didst punch my intoxicated comradeand some servos within his armor broke and verily shut down his armor, but thou didst most seriously bust open thy arm." Fist was shocked at this. "Will I ever be able to use again?" Scarlet Witch answered him this time. "Pym said that cast there would get things started as for fixing it but you'll be here for some time but you'll have full use once you're out." Fist relaxed a little; at least he would be fine. As they turned to leave the Cap saluted him and said "I'm sorry this had to happen to you, but will make sure that Iron Man can get the help he needs." Fist smiled weakly as he drifted off back to sleep. He had managed to topple a giant, and lived to tell of it. That was for sure. The only other sure thing for the day was that he had gotten enough exercise for a good while.


End file.
